Let’s Stop Pretending Women Don’t Like Masculine Men

Over the last decade, there has been a gradual push for men to become softer. Society has attacked masculinity, deemed it toxic, and pressured men to fall in line with feminist standards. Along with this disruption to masculinity has come the disintegration of gender norms. Yet when you really look at the men who women are actually interested in, they are not feminine men. 

About a month ago, a little song started circulating around TikTok: “I’m looking for a man in finance, trust fund, six five, blue eyes.” We’ve all heard it at this point because it took off, getting millions of views.

DJs took to re-mixing the song, and TikTokers everywhere picked it up to make mash-ups and different renditions of the song. Girls began stitching and captioning descriptions of the man they were looking for, and as it turns out, a lot of them didn’t care so much about landing a finance bro and were more interested in a “blue collar, tatted” guy or a “blue-collared husband” with a “dad bod.”

Women used this song to share their thoughts on an ideal man, and I did not see one video — not one — in which the ideal man was described as anything other than some kind of strong, masculine provider. Whether he’s a finance bro or a blue collar man, women are not looking to take care of nor save their man; they are looking to be taken care of and, dare I say, rescued themselves.

WATCH: The Comments Section with Brett Cooper on DailyWire+

Case and point: Women in New York City are regularly attending single mixers called “Rescue Me,” where the only men who can attend are either blue collar workers or first responders. I came across a post about these mixers from the Gothamist, who was the first I saw cover them. The event company, Single and the City, has been hosting these since 2008, and they are the “most popular and longest-running mixers from the events company Single and the City.”

The Gothamist article, “A night at ‘Rescue Me’ where women hope to date NYC firemen,” goes into detail on how these events got started. The event company’s founder, Amber Soletti, had such great experiences dating firemen that she wanted to encourage women to explore doing the same — so much so she created entire events based around this idea.

Soletti said Rescue Me parties were inspired by her own positive experiences dating firemen, who she thinks are sometimes snubbed by women in the local dating scene.

“There is a set of women that would refuse to go to this event because they think these guys are just too blue-collar for them,” she said. “They want, like, a finance type. But a lot of firemen make really good money. These guys have amazing benefits, they have pensions. I think a lot of women are actually missing out on this.”

And the women love it:

“I’ve always had a thing for men in uniform,” said Dee Carano, 34, a regular attendee, in a phone interview before the Friday event. “FDNY was a huge part of [my] growing up.”

Carano is from Middle Village, Queens, which she describes as a “blue-collar” neighborhood full of cops and firefighters, including many of her family members. She attended her first Rescue Me party about a decade ago and has met a few of her past boyfriends at the parties.

Carano said she returns to Rescue Me when she’s single, and particularly enjoys “being able to date someone that has such pride for their city.”

Obviously, the men love it too, though not any and every man can come to these events. Soletti recruits specific men and has a specific guest list system in which she invites via email and text. According to the Gothamist, she also “sends faxes to all the firehouses in the city.” One firefighter explained that it has helped take the guessing game out of dating and also create a forthright foundation from the beginning:

“I’m outgoing as it is, but on any given night, if you’re going out to, say, a bar with your friends, it’s hit or miss if anyone in the room is gonna want to talk to you,” he said. He also noted that it’s nice to meet women who are open to the demands of his job, with its intense hours and 24/7 on-call mentality.

From the men’s perspective, a “Rescue Me” event is a much better experience than a night at a crowded bar where you might approach a woman and hope she doesn’t take you for a creep and gamble on whether or not she is interested. It’s also better than spending hours upon hours swiping on dating apps where people randomly quit responding, have no intention of actually meeting, or never respond at all. As dating apps die off, events like these will likely become more popular.

Society needs these kinds of events now more than ever. Imagine being single, going to an event, and knowing everyone there is also single and also intentionally seeking a relationship. That alleviates a lot of stress, anxiety, and confusion from the dating process so you can focus on being yourself and putting your best foot forward. Most importantly, these events speak to the type of men with whom women are hoping to pursue a relationship: blue collar providers, masculine first responders, and strong men in uniform. Women line up at the door to get in.

A few of the comments about these events were quite laughable because of how ironic they were. As they commented on how terrible and toxic these masculine men are, they showed how angry, insecure, and bitter they are. One named these events a “hellscape,” which is absurd considering the women attending these events are normal feminine women who are interested in normal masculine men.

Some had many, many words to say about these events but ended up just coming across as angry for the sake of being angry. A few seemed bothered because these men don’t want to date them, but — based on lines like “they also don’t usually have ANY issues finding dates” — perhaps they are just jealous.

It is incredibly elitist, egotistical, and down right wrong to put such blanket assumptions on the men who serve and protect every single day. It’s probably women like the ones who wrote these comments that cause these events to be so successful because these men are tired of being attacked by women they date. Obviously, they would enjoy a mixer where women are interested in them, respect them, and understand the importance of their job.

These roles are desperately needed and should be respected. Two months ago, women were getting punched in the face walking down the street. People are attacked in the subway at all hours. But if this is truly what they think, then they really shouldn’t ever call the cops for help. The utter disrespect is insane.

Furthermore, while they may think these are “dumpster fire” ideas, that does not change the fact that these are actually wildly successful events that lead to well-adjusted couples and happy marriages. These are fantastic events, and I hope to see more continue to pop up with more professions and interests.

“Rescue Me” events just prove the type of men women do actually want to be in relationships with. On the whole, we need to stop pretending women don’t like masculine men, and women need to stop trying to convince themselves otherwise.

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Over the last decade, there has been a gradual push for men to become softer. Society has attacked masculinity, deemed it toxic, and pressured men to fall in line with feminist standards. Along with this disruption to masculinity has come the disintegration of gender norms. Yet when you really look at the men who women are actually interested in, they are not feminine men. 

About a month ago, a little song started circulating around TikTok: “I’m looking for a man in finance, trust fund, six five, blue eyes.” We’ve all heard it at this point because it took off, getting millions of views.

DJs took to re-mixing the song, and TikTokers everywhere picked it up to make mash-ups and different renditions of the song. Girls began stitching and captioning descriptions of the man they were looking for, and as it turns out, a lot of them didn’t care so much about landing a finance bro and were more interested in a “blue collar, tatted” guy or a “blue-collared husband” with a “dad bod.”

Women used this song to share their thoughts on an ideal man, and I did not see one video — not one — in which the ideal man was described as anything other than some kind of strong, masculine provider. Whether he’s a finance bro or a blue collar man, women are not looking to take care of nor save their man; they are looking to be taken care of and, dare I say, rescued themselves.

WATCH: The Comments Section with Brett Cooper on DailyWire+

Case and point: Women in New York City are regularly attending single mixers called “Rescue Me,” where the only men who can attend are either blue collar workers or first responders. I came across a post about these mixers from the Gothamist, who was the first I saw cover them. The event company, Single and the City, has been hosting these since 2008, and they are the “most popular and longest-running mixers from the events company Single and the City.”

The Gothamist article, “A night at ‘Rescue Me’ where women hope to date NYC firemen,” goes into detail on how these events got started. The event company’s founder, Amber Soletti, had such great experiences dating firemen that she wanted to encourage women to explore doing the same — so much so she created entire events based around this idea.

Soletti said Rescue Me parties were inspired by her own positive experiences dating firemen, who she thinks are sometimes snubbed by women in the local dating scene.

“There is a set of women that would refuse to go to this event because they think these guys are just too blue-collar for them,” she said. “They want, like, a finance type. But a lot of firemen make really good money. These guys have amazing benefits, they have pensions. I think a lot of women are actually missing out on this.”

And the women love it:

“I’ve always had a thing for men in uniform,” said Dee Carano, 34, a regular attendee, in a phone interview before the Friday event. “FDNY was a huge part of [my] growing up.”

Carano is from Middle Village, Queens, which she describes as a “blue-collar” neighborhood full of cops and firefighters, including many of her family members. She attended her first Rescue Me party about a decade ago and has met a few of her past boyfriends at the parties.

Carano said she returns to Rescue Me when she’s single, and particularly enjoys “being able to date someone that has such pride for their city.”

Obviously, the men love it too, though not any and every man can come to these events. Soletti recruits specific men and has a specific guest list system in which she invites via email and text. According to the Gothamist, she also “sends faxes to all the firehouses in the city.” One firefighter explained that it has helped take the guessing game out of dating and also create a forthright foundation from the beginning:

“I’m outgoing as it is, but on any given night, if you’re going out to, say, a bar with your friends, it’s hit or miss if anyone in the room is gonna want to talk to you,” he said. He also noted that it’s nice to meet women who are open to the demands of his job, with its intense hours and 24/7 on-call mentality.

From the men’s perspective, a “Rescue Me” event is a much better experience than a night at a crowded bar where you might approach a woman and hope she doesn’t take you for a creep and gamble on whether or not she is interested. It’s also better than spending hours upon hours swiping on dating apps where people randomly quit responding, have no intention of actually meeting, or never respond at all. As dating apps die off, events like these will likely become more popular.

Society needs these kinds of events now more than ever. Imagine being single, going to an event, and knowing everyone there is also single and also intentionally seeking a relationship. That alleviates a lot of stress, anxiety, and confusion from the dating process so you can focus on being yourself and putting your best foot forward. Most importantly, these events speak to the type of men with whom women are hoping to pursue a relationship: blue collar providers, masculine first responders, and strong men in uniform. Women line up at the door to get in.

A few of the comments about these events were quite laughable because of how ironic they were. As they commented on how terrible and toxic these masculine men are, they showed how angry, insecure, and bitter they are. One named these events a “hellscape,” which is absurd considering the women attending these events are normal feminine women who are interested in normal masculine men.

Some had many, many words to say about these events but ended up just coming across as angry for the sake of being angry. A few seemed bothered because these men don’t want to date them, but — based on lines like “they also don’t usually have ANY issues finding dates” — perhaps they are just jealous.

It is incredibly elitist, egotistical, and down right wrong to put such blanket assumptions on the men who serve and protect every single day. It’s probably women like the ones who wrote these comments that cause these events to be so successful because these men are tired of being attacked by women they date. Obviously, they would enjoy a mixer where women are interested in them, respect them, and understand the importance of their job.

These roles are desperately needed and should be respected. Two months ago, women were getting punched in the face walking down the street. People are attacked in the subway at all hours. But if this is truly what they think, then they really shouldn’t ever call the cops for help. The utter disrespect is insane.

Furthermore, while they may think these are “dumpster fire” ideas, that does not change the fact that these are actually wildly successful events that lead to well-adjusted couples and happy marriages. These are fantastic events, and I hope to see more continue to pop up with more professions and interests.

“Rescue Me” events just prove the type of men women do actually want to be in relationships with. On the whole, we need to stop pretending women don’t like masculine men, and women need to stop trying to convince themselves otherwise.

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